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today i woke up at 6:11 am. i hope i go to sleep at 10pm tonight. that would make me happy. please help me.
my english 45a professor is a little bit annoying. i want to like her, i really do, because she seems so enthusiastic about the text and so enthusiastic about medieval literature (she says mid-AY-vull) but sometimes, she’s just annoying. christianity plays a big part in the texts we’re reading, right? so at the beginning of class yesterday, she announced “many of us don’t come from christian backgrounds, and many of us who do don’t consider ourselves religious, or don’t belong any more to any christian or judeo-christian faith, and don’t have access to resources about these things. so if you want to look up who judas is and why the narrator in havelok keeps referring to ‘that traitor judas’ you can go here *starts writing www.n… stops and turns to look at us* and i HATE this name, it’s just oh-so-catholic, but really, it’s not so bad… *finishes writing www.newadvent.org/cathen* it’s a catholic encyclopedia, so it has all the doctrinal stuff, but it’s ok–the catholics are pretty liberal nowdays, right?”
etc. i felt under fire, or something. which is silly, yes, but the subtext was “well duh, anybody ‘cool’ and ‘with it’ isn’t religious, and religious people are these backwards superstitious folk and they’re funny because they’re not enlightened like us.” there was also a subtext of “christianity is this awful thing because so many bad things have been done in its name, and they’re all bigoted fundamentalists” when this girl told us about great reference book on the old testament but “it’s jewish so it only has the old testament, of course” and the professor immediately said “ah, so it shouldn’t have to be called the OLD testament… anyway”
it was a little weird, like she was apologizing for making us learn about christianity.
while i do not like fundamentalists and i guess i see them as “backwards, superstitious folk” myself, i have this feeling like they give the rest of us a bad name, or something. that she had to justify being able to give us the link to the catholic encyclopedia, which she said was a great resource on christian things, by laughing and saying that “oh it’s not that bad, the catholics are liberal now” is a little weird. it’s not so weird that it’s causing me to be offended, not really, maybe just a little put off.
i don’t understand people who refuse to “believe in evolution” because the bible apparently contradicts it fundamentally. i don’t understand people who say things like “have you accepted jesus as your personal lord and saviour ie joined our church and only our church what you haven’t you’re going to hell!” (dat aka cynic814; i just read his post on being more ecumenical) but still.
when i look at myself, i don’t see a fundamentalist, i don’t see a person blind to the truths of science, i don’t see a bigot. but i’m still christian, and even catholic. it is a little unsettling to be thus accused of irrationality every time someone says something dismissive of religious folk.