Untitled

This is the highest-quality video of the Zidane interview I’ve found on youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSA_I-nFXOU
BBC did a segment on it with some translations http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pWY9QLbeIxc

All I can understand is “parce que” and “les enfants” and “sur tout pas” and “la maman, la soeur.”

God, he’s such a beautiful man.

…..

This video made me say “what the crap?” out loud: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpG4AHlZrL4&search=materazzi
Yeah, lots of people commit fouls, but is everyone as bad as this guy?
Here’s another, shorter one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dlaqsOPlt-0&mode=related&search=Materazzi

There are tons of Zidane compilation videos on youtube. Here’s a pretty popular one that has a bunch of clips of him and Ronaldinho: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gjM06i54s3s&search=zidane%20ronaldinho

“Why are you so obsessed with this?” Ryan asks. I dunno. I feel like I haven’t been this drawn to something since the x-files. Oh, besides warcraft. Hmm. I guess I slip into relative obsession pretty easily, and always because of some small thing. My love of the backstreet boys was 100% the fault of krdogstar, who called (or maybe it was over IM?) me to demand that I turn on the TV to watch them perform at the end of SNL. My love of the new yorker is 100% the fault of mercuryfading who brought a copy to school to read, and mike cut it up during vertigo to use a cartoon in his layout. I heard of the x-files because of–and this is truly embarrassing–some retarded Newsweek article on the movie (I told you it was embarrassing. In chatrooms and forums ever after, when people asked “what season/episode turned you on to the xfiles” and I’d answer “the movie,” people would respond with shock because the movie was so unlike the series and they didn’t know anyone who was converted to loving the series after being exposed to the movie. I’m sure, like always, that there exists a more elegant way of saying that, but I’m too lazy to find it.) And I hadn’t even heard of Zidane until Alan said “look at Zidane, he’s playing like a madman because he’s going to retire.” And there you have it.

slate has a bunch of articles, some include how to headbutt like a pro, wtf magic spray, this article is funny

i’ll just deposit links here as i find them

.gif
something awful – animated .gif fever… wow. just wow.
video – one of many compilations of the animated .gifs
more smartassity – photos with captions

zidane compilations
this one is my favorite – compilations r fun. this one has lots of dancing around; many of the others focus on goals. it also has some dives and misses and fouls. he totally taunts two guys at 2:13, it’s funny. also, this compliation uses a muse song in the middle. yay muse
this one is good too – found it via looking at random people whose blogs link to the above video. ah, youtube options
zidane compilation – seems to be exclusively from the 2006 world cup, and also seems to be put together by a tv station?
goals and stuff – the music choice is hilariously terrible. i like the one at 3:35 that gets replayed a couple of times. apparently put together by an asian (chinese?) real madrid fan website?

in general
dives from all over – this is funny
this commentator is awesome. henry is too
how the italy team trains HAHAHA

YOUTUBE IS THE BANE OF MY EXISTENCE

12 comments

  1. He doesn’t really explain the incident; if you want the translation of what he says in the beginning, it’s basically this:

    “First, he grabbed my jersey. Right there. And I told him to get off me. And then I said we could fight after the match [I think this is what he says]. And then he said something. Something, as I’ve said, that affected me deeply. It all happened very quickly.”

    Reply

  2. Oh, yes, he also says it was insults toward the “women of my family”. He’s also sorry for the children who watched. Very sorry for the children. He insists that “le coupabale c’est lui qui provoke”. I didn’t spell that right but you get the point.

    For whatever reason I can understand Zidane and his lovely Southern accent perfectly but the interviewer speaks too quickly for me.

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    1. Yeah, I understood “it happened really fast” and something like “I’m not gonna say what he said, but it was very personal,” and “je m’excuse especially to les enfants” (well without the part that got translated to english in my brain, but you know what I mean), and the part about saying he regretted it would be like saying what Materazzi said was OK, which he could never do “sur tout pas.”

      It’s kind of like listening to the Chinese news for me. All I can understand are the propositions, until someone prompts me (I’ve read articles in English about the interview), and then I can start guessing what the phrases are, matching what I know was said to the sounds. Which is kind of sad, considering I’ve been exposed to Chinese since birth, but my level of sophisticated Chinese comprehension is about the same as for French, which I studied lackadasically at best.

      Yeah, I can tell that the interviewer says “d’accord” and “on y va” har har

      Also, listen to the heartbroken French commentators: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uv5OyFi9Csg
      AH NON!!! O ZINEDINE!!! AH NON!!! PAS CA!!!!! PAS CA!!!!! PAS AUJOURDHUI!!!!! QU’EST-CE QUE TU AS FAIT??!??!?!!? AIII YAI YAI YAI YAI YAIII!!!!! C’EST CARTON ROUGE AH NON!!!! AH NON!!!!!! C’EST PAS POSSIBLE!!!! hahahaha, it’s so depressing. SORTIER A CARTON ROUGE!!! C’EST LA DERNIER FOIS (?) !!!

      So like, I dunno why I’m still so obsessed over this. Happens sometimes, I latch onto something and fail to get over it while the rest of the world moves on. Can you direct me to a “I went from not giving two shits about football to being completely obsessed with a tragic star in roughly 2 days’ time” support group? I’d appreciate that a lot

      Reply

      1. Can you direct me to a “I went from not giving two shits about football to being completely obsessed with a tragic star in roughly 2 days’ time” support group? I’d appreciate that a lot

        I think it’s called “Europe” at the moment. Everyone’s obsessed over here.

        I didn’t know you were still loving the New Yorker. God. I miss it so f’ing much. When I was in Heathrow last I headed straight for the international magazine store to get it, and it was still a month old. I think the New Yorker and the Sunday New York Times would be enough enticement to get me to move back to the States, sadly. Know any open Scottish Lit posts?

        Reply

  4. Materazzi ain’t nothin’

    Materazzi’s fouls really aren’t that bad for the most part…of the “top 5,” two are dives, and one is a 50/50 challenge. You want horror tackles, check out Roy Keane of Manchester United.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJuxKrnTP-k&search=roy%20keane

    The back story is that the first tackle is one committed on Keane by a defender named Alf Inge Haaland, one that tore knee ligaments and kept Keane out of the game for a month or two. Keane swore revenge, and a few years later committed the second tackle, which broke Haaland’s leg and ended his career. Note how the shaven-headed Keane pauses to scream at the prone Haaland as he leaves the pitch…now that’s classy.

    Also, Ronaldinho…is pretty good.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-nI_AXenZI&search=ronaldinho

    Reply

    1. Re: Materazzi ain’t nothin’

      HAHA, broke his leg … gosh. Yeah those “5” weren’t that bad, some of the ones in the “longer” video were though.

      Yeah! I saw that Ronaldinho “touch of gold” video and forgot to put it up in my collection of links. That is insane. Do you think it’s 100% real?

      Reply

      1. Yeah I think it is…it would have to be digitally faked, and although that’s possible, the video quality doesn’t seem good enough to justify digital editing. Of course, I could be wrong, but seeing how Ronaldinho plays I get the feeling that he really just is THAT good.

        It’s a lot easier to do crazy things like that on an empty pitch with no pressure and just to fool around than it is in a game situation where things count…even when you’re as easy-going as the man seems to be when he plays for real.

        Reply

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