1) why did my color scheme become bluish during the day today? i thought “OH MY GOD SOMEONE HACKED MY LIVEJOURNAL!” but checked my settings and yes indeedy i was still labelled as watermelon-colored. a few other journals became bluey too, while most stayed the same. must have been a bug? 2) wah.

on saturday, i performed with all real at a berkeley high “asian pacific islander festival” at mlk park. it was… uh, interesting. the wireless mics didn’t really work/weren’t loud enough. we were confused about when to go on, and then all of a sudden they announced us and vs was in the bathroom, so we kinda stalled, and then after the first song they were like “hey, y’all can’t cuss! say ‘ish’ or something! there’s little kids!!!” so we were like “crap!! sorry!!!” (well, i don’t swear in my little 1-line bits, but yeah) … but theresa didn’t hear that so you could see the high schoolers planning/running the festival cringe when she said “motherfucker” … haha. i saw derek from foothill walk by–he sat down for a song and waved. that was cool. a girl danced to one of our songs, that was cool too =) haha this boyband group got up after us and they were so bad… i looked in the program today and TWO of them were 23 years old (the other two were 18 and 19)… 23!!!! i thought they were all in jr high or high school! … POOR imitation of nsync with vaguely hip-hop-ish dance moves and barely audible voices, and they were bad when they were audible. haha. man. and then their sound got all screwed up, which wasn’t their fault, so that was even sadder. anyway. so then we went to davis to perform at what apparently was a day conference type thing run by davis students for high school students from around sacramento on cambodian deportation and racism, especially against asians in america. laura aka shigi came and performed too. about our performance: it was cool! i think the audience liked us. i clowned around in the background so they laughed, and poor derek kept turning around like “why are they laughing?!?!” … sorry derek =) the mics were too quiet again, but it was indoors, so for “here we go” i gave up using the mic and yelled. that was fun. la la la. haha, some people asked us for autographs. that was kinda strange. we even autographed some shirts. hahaha. yeah, they gave us all shirts that said their motto “who we be” on the back. i don’t know who i be. laura did really well! she sang and two people played guitar. they were good. we ate at in-n-out. theresa is funny (and has many shoes). on the car ride home someone commented that all the shows we’ve done were for asian events… i got to thinking about how lots of people are really committed to promoting awareness of asian racism, pointing out stereotypes, lambasting movies and ads, etc. i’m aware of it, i guess–how can asian people (or any kind of minority person) not be?–there are many causes to involve yourself in and put your energy to–there’s a girl at newman who prays for the college pro-life movement–ramble. sometimes i feel like i’m faking stuff. like, i’m asian, so therefore i’ll support this cause that i’m singing at with this hip hop group all real, and sign your tshirt that says “who we be” on it… or something. i know i’m taking it too seriously. also i’m not really into the whole hip hop thing. i like talib kweli. i like some stuff. but listening to them talk in a whole other language is kinda strange, and they’re really serious about making music, and i’m like “well i’m just here to sing a hook, that’s all” … like, who am i trying to be? who am i trying to be when i talk to the cambodian deportation activists and say “yeah, i’ve uh, never taken an asian american studies class but i want to sometime” or when i tell anyone “i like talib kweli” or anything?

nono, it doens’t matter. i can like what i like, and i don’t have to be interested or knowledgable about everything under the sun. relax, judy. sometimes i don’t let myself live. i’m too insecure. blah blah blah.

ryan walked on sunday. graduated, i mean. james shamus, the guy who wrote the screenplay for some of ang lee’s movies (ice storm, crouching tiger) was the main speaker. he also got his phd! that was cool. he started off talking about student debt and ran through some rough calculations that ended up showing that the interest building up for each graduate present during the time it would take for him to make his speech was $1 and that he’d gladly give any of them a buck if his speech wasn’t worth it. that was funny. then he went at length about english majors being trained to discern truth from lies and that we’re being lied to by the government and the media. i guess i didn’t expect his speech to be so political. (at one point someone in the front yelled “whatever!” and someone behind us booed. lameness.) congrats ryan. fooded at zaika.